the peaceful fury of my heart

2003-03-30T22:33:00.000-06:00

have you ever smiled so much your face hurt? :)

2003-03-21T14:09:00.000-06:00

Restore us, O God Almighty; make your face shine upon us, that we may be saved.
~Psalm 80:7

I decided to blog today because I haven't in a long time. Life has been SO busy recently because of a few things (if you wanna hear about them I can tell you in person sometime). I just got my second dynamics test back today. I probably could have done better but I am DEFINITELY not complaining cause I PASSED!!! YAY! That makes me extremely happy.

Anyway, have a wonderful day and I pray that God would bless each person that reads this!

2003-03-14T20:29:00.000-06:00

I had SO much fun last night and today! Almost my entire family went camping, including my parents, brother, sister-in-law, 3-year old nephew, and 7-month old niece. My sister and my Grammie were the only ones who couldn't make it. I realized today that I like to do things that scare me. I climbed a bunch of trees, climbed a dam that had REALLY cold water coming over the top, and did some other fun and crazy things. I was looking for more scary things to do, but it was a small park so I didn't find much else. I got pretty sunburned and didn't sleep much so that was not so fun. Pretty much besides that I had a wonderfully amazingly bodacious time with my family! They are so stinkin awesome!

2003-03-11T21:53:00.000-06:00

I officially am very happy about my cable modem. The "high speed" internet at school just doesn't compare!

2003-03-08T00:07:00.000-06:00

I am so glad that spring break is here! Praise the Lord for a relaxing week (hopefully!)

While lounging in a field outside reading a book laying under the amazingly warm and yummy sun, I happened to glance over towards the Assembly Building where people were grouped together praying and waiting for their spring break mission trips. It was altogether familiar yet horribly vauge. I have always been one of them, this time I was an outsider looking on. They had met up around noon or so, sorted their bags, packed extra Spanish Bibles, tied colored ribbons to their things so they could tell which luggage was going where, and then they sat and waited to hear their team name called so they could pile into busses or vans and begin their 18-30 hour bus rides. This is what I know of my spring breaks at college. This is what I've always done. I prayed and never felt peace with going on a trip this year so I am going home. I am very excited to see my nephew, my niece, my parents, my sister, my brother, my sister-in law, and my good friend liz. I will enjoy resting and catching up on some schoolwork and reading while at home. Although I know this time will be wonderful my heart aches. It aches for purpose, it aches to be a part of something, it aches to serve, to lead, to follow, to build up, to be used. Instead of bringing it to God as I know I should, I tried to dull my ache, my burning desire. For anyone who knows me, they know that I do not watch movies very often. Tonight I watched two movies back to back. It was wonderfully mind capturing and pulled my perspective away from those things which it was so focused on. I am no longer hurting and longing because I have just almost satisfied myself. I pigged out on junk food, so to speak, instead of waiting for the main delicacies. The movies weren't bad, but I went to them instead of God and that was bad. I know that God will do many things in me over this break. I pray that He redeems my time so that I will not waste this opportunity to rest in Him.

Anyway, those are my random thoughts of the evening. I do not know how many people will actually be reading these cause of the break, but oh well! Have a wonderful break and stay safe.

2003-03-05T18:22:00.000-06:00

Sorry for the recent lack of updating. My second Dynamics test has come and gone. I think I did better than on the first one so that's happy. I'm off the the "Don't Date Naked" chapel tonight. That should be interesting. Have a wonderful and safe spring break!

2003-03-02T23:37:00.000-06:00

Wisdom is not a product of schooling but of the life-long attempt to acquire it.

Few are those who see with their own eyes and feel with their own hearts.

The value of a man resides in what he gives and not in what he is capable receiving.
~Albert Einstein

2003-03-01T14:12:00.000-06:00

so at weddings why is it that the person who wants the bouquet LEAST always gets it?

2003-03-01T07:15:00.000-06:00

God is so good to me! He has blessed me with so many wonderful friends! Last night I had the opportunity to hang out with a new friend. She is really awesome and has a heart for the Lord so we just walked around a bit and prayed for each other, the campus and other things. It was so cool. I also got to hang out with another friend last night. She is absolutely amazing, God really used her to bless me last night too. Encouragement is definitely a gift of hers and she used it. I love how God knows exactly how to use others to bless us!

As far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our transgressions from us.
~Psalm 103:13

2003-02-27T09:52:00.000-06:00

I am reading a book called "A Heart Ablaze" by John Bevere. While I was reading it a little this morning some very thought-provoking things stuck out:

"The ways and standards of the kingdom of God are consistent, for God does not change...

Does the entertainment industry have discernment? Do the executives and decision makers know the fruit that God seeks in His people? So why do we rely on the ratings of the industry instead of discernment? Has God changed in the past twenty years to accommodate the trends of this generation? Absolutely not! If God's standards have not changed then why have the average American believer's standards changed? We have been linked to the culture, not to the kingdom [of God] in our lifestyles. This pattern is evident in all areas of life..."

It goes on to talk about the early Christians and how they rejected the ungodly attitudes, mannerisms, and entertainment of their culture to embrace and conform to the ways of the kingdom of God. I think its interesting stuff to think about. Have a blessed day!

2003-02-25T22:41:00.000-06:00

you gotta read stu's comment on our Thermo book's advice on relationships...

also, would you think it strange if a certain person washed their gloves in the bathroom sink because the gloves we dirty from use? SOMEONE (Sarah Plymale) thinks I am unusually odd because of it...

2003-02-24T14:15:00.000-06:00

Today is a good day. I really like going to dynamics and thermo cause I have so much fun. Gonzo makes fun of people and non-technical majors during dynamics and during thermo some of the guys and I make fun of the thermo book and other select topics. All in all it makes for a wonderful day of classes :)

I think I am going to have a "dynamics party" with all the people in my dynamics class. That should be fun as long as we don't talk about dynamics. :)

On another note....
I think that God laughs when he decides the weather for East Texas. Seriously, it seems as if someone can't make up their mind as to what the weather should be like. It's like when I try to pick out candy, I kinda want skittles, then again I want sour straws, oh wait theres some mints, no nevermind, I want the reese's peanut butter cups, heck, why don't I just buy ALL of them... This is what the weather seems like. :)

2003-02-22T15:10:00.000-06:00

my heart speaks...

You found me in the darkness and brought me light
You took my lifeless heart and gave me life
Cleansed me from my sin and filled me up
With Your Spirit and with your Love
Now I'm laughing at the things that once held me bound,
I'm dancing in the freedom that I've found
Cause your love is better than life Lord
I long for you more than I ever did before

I can't get enough of You
Cause I am in love with You
Oh how I long for You
Cause I am in love with You...

So here I am in worship with open eyes,
Now I wanna live a blameless life
Cause I am finally living at last
You give me hope to leave my past
I will not keep silent I will sing of the
Wonder of my God and his great love
And every day my heart is enlarged for You
so I will abandon myself to you

I can't get enough of You
Cause I am in love with You
Oh how I long for You
Cause I am in love with You...

It burns like a blazing fire
It rises like a mighty flame
It’s my greatest desire to be sealed and loved by your Name...

~Darrell Evans, "I can't get enough of you"

2003-02-20T15:03:00.000-06:00

So I've started writing down funny things from dynamics class...(pardon the nerdiness...)

"Why is the stinking right-hand rule not working!!!!" ~Rebecca
"Because you are using your left hand..." ~random wise one in the room

"I wish I could be a boy so I could study on boys floors." ~Rebecca
"There are surgeries for that..." ~David Eaton

"Couples have moments" ~Dr. G

"alpha on the left side is SIN!!!" ~Dr. G
"but the blood of Jesus covers all sin" ~Josh Friesenhahn

"Don't double dip with PAT!" ~Dr. G

"We're ahead of schedule" ~josh
"AND on budget" ~Dr. G
(both in reference to the number of dropouts thus far in dynamics this semester)

So if you don't understand some of these jokes, it's really ok, what you can do is just pretend you are an ant walking on a record that is attatched to a hydraulic rod which is sitting on a block with friction that is sliding off of a moving bus and onto a little yellow sports car which is driving on a planet with variable gravity, depending upon velocity. Once you pretend that, EVERYTHING will be ok! ;)

2003-02-20T00:20:00.000-06:00

I made a bet. It is a funny bet. Stu is going to have to dress in drag. He will lose. Don't worry, I will take pictures :)

Any ideas as to what I should make him wear once he loses?

2003-02-18T01:32:00.000-06:00

random thought # 529 (this evening)

Tonight I was looking at some "Valentine's Day" pictures of my 3-year old nephew, Caleb Isaac, and my 6-month old niece, Hailey Elizabeth. Something draws me to just look at the pictures of them over and over. I couldn't understand it for a while, and still don't entirely, but I have more of a grasp on it than before. I love them so much it hurts. At first I thought it was just cause they are really cute kids. But no, I would still love them. Then I thought I must be afraid that something in the horrible world we live in would somehow contaminate them, but in reality it already has. God, through Christ, sees them as they will be when they die and go to heaven (hopefully this is not coming ANYTIME soon). I am not afraid of pain or sorrow hurting them. I just look at the pictures, and when I'm with them I look at them and I just love them so deeply it is unexplainable. It is so deep that it rivals all the pain I've ever been through, all the sorrow I've ever know. I love these kids so much.

One day I hope to be a mother. I don't really know if that is what God will bring into my life or not. I don't even know if I'm going to get married, much less have kids. One thing I do know is that if I have kids I will love them even more deeply than I love Caleb and Hailey. I don't know if that is possible, but I know I will.

With love comes pain. When I open my heart up to someone, whether I am aware or unaware, I am allowing them the same potential to hurt me as well as love me. To me this is a scary thought. My heart is saddened that God could have opened up everything that He possibly could to us as humans and we just rejected him. I cannot express in words the thoughts that want to be shared right now. Throughout the Old Testament the Prophets speak of God doing something, so that His people would remember Him or recognize Him in some way or another. The people kept turning back to their ways though, and still He kept coming back. I DO NOT understand why He would do such a thing. I reject Him daily. He opens His heart and I just hurt Him. I just cause Him pain. He knows He's God; He knows He's powerful. He doesn't need me; He knows that I need Him. I look at myself in utter disgust right now. How could a measly little person like me EVER think that I could possibly reject the Lord that I need so badly? He offers Himself so willingly and I need Him so desperately. I wish that I could love Him as He loves me. I wish that I could show Him how much He means to me. I love my Jesus.

(So I went off on a little tangent there...Sorry if the thoughts don't connect cause my head goes faster than my fingers and sometimes I forget to mention what ties one thought to the one before it...)

2003-02-15T16:06:00.000-06:00

i've lost my mind...

I have so much on my mind and so many things to write, but when I get here to actually do the typing my thoughts out nothing of any sense seems to come out...

I love change, but sometimes I hate change. In order to fully appreciate it I must embrace it and not look back with anything but gratitude. I am grateful that I learned from the bad times and that I had the good times. Change is good because nothing can stay the same, except God, but he has so many parts to him that he can seem inconsistent at times. So my life is changing and I feel like I've gotten left somewhere back behind. In the rush of all this changing I have forgotten something, I'm lost in the past, I've become defined by my experiences instead of defining them myself. I've not lived life to it's fullest. I've not embraced all that God has for me. This saddens my heart. I must push aside the conforming attitude that once ruled me and cling to whatever God puts in my path. I must seize every moment. I MUST live in the freedom that only God can provide. I must not be bound again by the things that once encompassed me. I must press on towards the goal to win the prize for which Jesus Christ took hold of me.

2003-02-12T22:29:00.000-06:00

Life is like riding a bicycle. To keep your balance you must keep moving
~Albert Einstein

2003-02-11T21:18:00.000-06:00

I want to know God's thoughts...the rest are details.
~Albert Einstein

2003-02-11T18:47:00.000-06:00

where did you go?
Don't you hate it when you realize that you haven't been spending as much time with friends as you should? Everyone started asking me "where I've been recently". STINK! I've been holed up in my room doing practically nothing! Oh well, such is life!

oh, and I got this link off samantha's blog, it's kinda exciting...

which smilie are you?

2003-02-10T22:01:00.000-06:00

...don't cry over spilt milk and don't try to saw sawdust...

"...one morning, our class filed into the science laboratory, and there was the teacher, Dr. Paul Brandwine, with a bottle of milk prominently displayed on the edge of the desk. We all sat down, staring at the milk, and wondering what it had to do with the hygiene course he was teaching. Then, all of a sudden, Dr. Paul Brandwine stood up, swept the bottle of milk with a crash into the sink-- and shouted: don't cry over spilt milk!"
"He then made us all come to the sink and look at the wreckage. "take a good look," he told us, "because I want you to remember this lesson the rest of your lives. That milk is gone-- you can see it's down the drain, and all the fussing and hair-pulling is the world won't bring back a drop of it. With a little thought and prevention, that milk might have been saved. But it's too late now--all we can do is write it off, forget it, and go on to the next thing."

"How many of you have ever sawed wood? Let's see your hands." Most of them had. Then he inquired: how many of you have ever sawed sawdust?"
No hands went up.
"Of course you can't saw sawdust!" Mr. Shedd exclaimed. "It's already sawed! And it's the same with the past. When you start worrying about things that are over and done with, you're merely trying to saw sawdust." ....
So why waste the tears? Of course, we have been guilty of blunders and absurdities! And so what? Who hasn't? Even Napoleon lost one third of all the important battles he fought. Perhaps our average is no worse than Napoleon's. Who knows? And, anyhow, all the king's horses and all the king's men can't put the past together again.

So let's remember: ****Dont' try to saw sawdust.*****"

From "How to Stop Worrying and Start Living" by Dale Carnegie

~Dale Carnegie

2003-02-10T10:10:00.000-06:00

I’ve never considered failure as an option in life. I prayed to be broken, I hate where it got me. I wear my pride more than my favorite jacket. To get a grade way below average in my easiest class really pierces my puffed up pride in ways that it hates to be pierced. I hate failure, I hate getting horrible grades, I AM BETTER THAN THAT GRADE, that’s what my pride tells me. I know I shouldn’t think that of myself, but I do, I know I should just graciously accept failure and learn from it. I do not want to let go. I do not want to admit that I got that grade. I am above this class…

Why am I even taking classes? There are too many risks involved. I hate my weaknesses. I hate that it is so easy for me to procrastinate. Why is it such a temptation? Why do I do what I hate? I wish that I didn’t care; I wish that I could either procrastinate because I could care less about classes, or I could be diligent because I do care. Instead I care a lot and procrastinate a lot. I hate that part of my life, the dark ravines I desperately try to hide. I want to give up here and now. Why does life have such pain, such hardship? Why is it that through this I learn the most? Why is it that the toughest road is the one I’m on? Why can’t life be easier? The shallow, logical surface of me looks at the present situation and assumes that I am being ridiculous and making a big deal of nothing. But deeper down I am experiencing true and intense pain. Whether it is pride, fear, or just plain hurt, I am being cut. Emotions are horrible when I need sleep…

Oh how I long to be free of this pain, this horrible life that is entangled by sin.

2003-02-10T07:29:00.000-06:00

Because your love is better than life, my lips will glorify you.
Psalm 63:3

O LORD, correct me, but with judgment; not in thine anger, lest thou bring me to nothing.
Jeremiah 10:24

2003-02-10T01:11:00.000-06:00

A question that sometimes drives me hazy:
am I or are the others crazy?
-Albert Einstein

I want to know how God created this world.
I am not interested in this or that phenomenon,
in the spectrum of this or that element.
I want to know His thoughts; the rest are details.
-Albert Einstein

From failing my first dynamics test, to entering into the world of singlehood again, it was a long week. I am awestruck at how the Lord gave me peace in the midst of all that went on last week. I was never that stressed or worried about things, which is a shock. All I can do is thank Him for helping me, it was only by His grace that I am still sane.
Here are some random thoughts of the week:

a majority of my growth in Christ happens during times of greatest affliction...

not taking risks is risking everything...
The world is a dangerous place, not because of those who do evil, but because of those who look on and do nothing.
-Albert Einstein

Life is not tried, it is merely survived
If you're standing outside the fire...
There's this love that is burning
Deep in my soul
Constantly yearning to get out of control
Wanting to fly higher and higher
I can't abide
Standing outside the fire
-Garth Brooks

i am who i am...
Few are those who see with their own eyes and feel with their own hearts.
-Albert Einstein

i love my mommy. She came to visit this weekend. One of my biggest goals in life is to learn to serve God and, in turn, people as much as she does. My mother truely has a servant's heart. She also has a soft heart to hear the Lord and to follow His word. She's such an inspiration!
The value of a man resides in what he gives and not in what he is capable receiving.
-Albert Einstein

sleep can solve SO many problems...

dynamics tests DO NOT necessarily represent what you know about dynamics, they just tell you how well you can take tests...
Not everything that can be counted counts, and not everything that counts can be counted.
-Albert Einstein

God is in control
We know nothing at all. All our knowledge is but the knowledge of schoolchildren. The real nature of things we shall never know
-Albert Einstein

I REALLY like Albert Einstein's ideas on things... I need to look up more quotes by him! Did you know he slept 11 hours on average EVERY night! If he needed 11 hours, then certainly I can take my 8 hours without worrying about sleeping too much! :)

To me, THIS is inspirational:
I am neither especially clever nor especially gifted. I am only very, very curious.
-Albert Einstein

I don't believe in mathematics.
-Albert Einstein

and finally, this is a good thought to chew on:
If A equals success, then the formula is: A = X + Y + Z, X is work. Y is play. Z is keep your mouth shut.
-Albert Einstein

2003-01-31T00:33:00.000-06:00

I am gonna go CRAZY...

I hate to complain, but I have 4 tests next week! Teachers should REALLY schedule their tests all on different days! On Wednesday I am supposed to take a 3 hour Dynamics test, a Thermodynamics test, and a Chemistry 2 test! AHHHHHH, too much...BRAIN IS OVERLOADED AND FLIPPING OUT!!!! Say a prayer for me if you get the chance!

PS: I might not me blogging for a little bit so I can study more ;)

2003-01-29T21:41:00.000-06:00

I get SO nervous when I make chapel announcements! It is SO funny! Today I made an announcement about the praise and worship thing thats going on Thursday night.(9:30, Speer Chapel, come if you can!!!) When I sat down after the announcement I couldn't get my hands and legs to stop shaking! I never thought I had a problem speaking in front of people before! I guess I was wrong! ;)

2003-01-26T18:36:00.000-06:00

interestingly enough, I pretty much love everything French. I think that the Lord has given me a heart for that country, and it is SO funny to see how it comes out in my actions. I like french fries, I like french vanilla coffee, I like quiche, I like Noutella (I had it first in France), I love Normandie(this is how you REALLY spell it!) and Paris and Lille and Mt. St. Michele and that little village by the sea (I forgot the name), I absolutely adore French castles (Chambord, Versailles, Chenonceau), the French Revolution fascinates me (I don't condone it by any means though...), etc, etc, etc... I like France and French things. I don't really speak it so well anymore, but I love the way the French language sounds too. My heart jumps every time I hear it spoken here in the States. I don't think that God wants me to go to France permanently, but that he wants me to pray for France and/or go over there on regular short term missions. Maybe I'll even get to dance ;)

I hope everyone has a BLAST watching the Super Bowl. I REALLY hope I finish my "DIE"-namics before too long so I'll get to watch it too! Have a good one!
~bec

2003-01-25T17:03:00.000-06:00

It's the best of times, it's the worst of times...

So you know how days can be SO great and SO not great both at the same time? Well I'm not gonna go into details as to why it was so bad cause I believe in protecting the "not-so innocent". But today was SO great cause I got to hang out with a really close friend and God is doing cool stuff in her life. She went to a prayer meeting that I was at Thursday evening and so I heard her pray some specific things. Well yesterday God answered those things in huge ways! It was so encouraging to her and to me. I love how God sends encouragement my way RIGHT when I need it.

Another friend of mine came by yesterday to tell me about what God was doing for HER this week. It was SO SO SO stinkin awesome! There were some big decisions she needed to make and God just worked it out so that either way she decided things would work out. I know thats kinda random, but you can read more about her if you want cause she has a blog! http://zippyjean.blogspot.com/

It was also so encouraging to hear that from her. I was thinking today after I got back from talking to my other friend that it is SO exciting to hear what God is doing in other people's lives, but it would be even more exciting if God could do something like that in mine. He actually has done a lot for me, but hearing these two girls made me inspired to seek Him even harder. I don't really want to for my benefit, but really cause the burning fire within me was just kindled. When it starts burning this bad I don't think I should ignore it. Actually I don't want to see what would happen if I did. Ao anyway, enough randomness for today! Seek God with all your heart today! byeeeeeee...

2003-01-22T21:41:00.000-06:00

I've decided that today is an official "I feel like poo and I don't know why" day. Don't you hate that kind of day?

I have come to some conclusions about life and those who live it. From what I've seen and heard in all of my 20+ years on this earth I've discovered an obvious, but basically overlooked theme. Life would really stink big time without God. I've also discovered something else. Sin is easy. Sin is addicting. Addiction is misery. Misery bites. The very thing that separates me from God is the thing I keep running to. It's the story of mankind. I muse as I think of the many times I've read about the Israelites "cycles of sin" in the Old Testament. They turned from Him, He drew them back and forgave them, they changed for the good, and then they eventually turned to the sin again. How I hate that which I run to. I long for the day when this sin, when this bondage, when this mask can finally be shed. I long for the day when I can approach my Savior never to sin again. I long for that day when I no longer will be constantly disappointed by what could have been and instead will be enthralled by what is.

These are my thoughts... Have a wonderful day/evening/what not...

2003-01-21T01:45:00.000-06:00

I officially apologize for the death of my blog for a while. I got busy, and then distracted, and then I just plain forgot about it for a while. Tonight as I was listening to some music that I plan on dancing to for the upcoming talent show type thing (Hootenanny) I decided that I wanted to write in my blog a bit!

There is something that is on my mind. It is a question that I do not know the answer to. Why does listening to two seconds of one song generate more emotion and passion than all my excitement for engineering over the years put together? Why does my heart surge and skip a beat merely thinking of dancing?

The “Me” that people do not know screams to come to the surface. Dancing reveals that which is otherwise only seen in small glimmers. Oh how I love to dance, I love to use every fiber of my being to express what is going on inside. There are not enough words to express how much I love to dance. How I thank God that I can dance, that He has blessed me with the opportunity to do something I love so much. My passion for dance is only surpassed by my extreme, unyielding, undying desire to know my Lord. Every part of that which is me longs to become one with Him. Intimacy is the goal, Love, Assurance, Faith, Fury, Passion, Desire, these all play into it. The intensity of knowing God is displayed in dance. It is a fight. I am fighting to become closer, to be lesser so that He is greater. I am overwhelmed by my desire for Him. My "passion" for engineering is nothing more than a fluttering dead leaf compared to a monstrous and mighty forest.

These are my thoughts for the evening. I came to a conclusion long ago that I would not make big decisions late at night so I have no conclusion to what I said above. They are just my thoughts for the evening. :)

2002-11-22T14:44:00.000-06:00

The lyrics below are from one of two songs which are my current favorites. When God is wanting me to focus on something in my life sometimes He shows me a song that has to do with what He is doing. It is really really cool stuff. So anyway, currently God is reminding me of the reality that I am in a spiritual battle. It is a constant force in my life and ignorance is not one of my options. If I were to pretend that there was no enemy fighting his butt off to get my focus of Jesus, I would be living a lie and this conspirator would get his way. So back to the song... It's basically saying, "I'm not looking for trouble, but it's coming and God is going to teach me through it, so BRING IT ON!" I think it is so awesome that God can and does take satan's attacks and just throws them back in his face by teaching us through them. These are my thoughts of the day :)

Here's the song:

Bring it on

(James 1:2-4; Heb. 10:38-39; Rom. 8:37; 2 Cor. 12: 9-10; Gen. 50:20; Rom. 5: 3-5)

I didn’t come lookin’ for trouble
And I don’t want to fight needlessly
But I’m not gonna hide in a bubble
If trouble comes for me
I can feel my heart beating faster
I can tell something’s coming down
But if it’s gonna make me grow stronger then…

Bring it on
Let the lightning flash, let the thunder roll, let the storm winds blow
Bring it on
Let the trouble come, let the hard rain fall, let it make me strong
Bring it on

Now, maybe you’re thinkin’ I’m crazy
And maybe I need to explain some things
‘Cause I know I’ve got an enemy waiting
Who wants to bring me pain
But what he never seems to remember
What he means for evil God works for good
So I will not retreat or surrender

Now, I don’t want to sound like some hero
‘Cause it’s God alone that my hope is in
But I’m not gonna run from the very things
That would drive me closer to Him
So bring it on

Bring it on
Let the lightning flash, let the thunder roll, let the storm winds blow
Bring it on
Let the trouble come, let it make me fall on the One who’s strong
Bring it on
Let the lightning flash, let the thunder roll, let the storm winds blow
Bring it on
Let me be made weak so I’ll know the strength of the One who’s strong
Bring it on

2002-11-19T22:24:00.000-06:00

Does anyone have any exciting ideas for me to do for my Digital Project???

upon request, I will expound upon the above question!
For the project we have to make something that does something using digital chips that serves some kind of purpose. That is about the most ambiguous sentence that I have ever written, but basically the assignment is just as ambiguous. Examples of projects in the past are alarm clocks, stop watches, video games, scrolling letters on a screen, graphic equalizers, etc..

Currently my brain is not in a creative mood and I can't think of a single thing that sounds remotely interesting. Let me know if you have any ideas. Thanks a lot!

2002-11-19T17:10:00.000-06:00

There seems to be an attitude on this campus of extreme and utter disgust for any slight thing the administration has any hand in doing. This frustrates me. It is such a blessing to even be able to come here and all we can do is nit-pick on every little bit of something bad we can possibly find. For once I wish that I could go to dinner or read a blog or pass by someone saying something even remotely good about our school. This rarely happens. These are some of my thoughts today. I probably could write much more on this topic but I am hungry. I am off to Saga where I can have a wonderful white cherry icee at the amazing new icee machine. :)

2002-11-17T23:25:00.000-06:00

When you feel like the days just drone on and on and on
and you feel like the nights are quickly gone

and on the inside your heart is gaping wide
and on the inside you feel like no one's on your side
well, I am

When you thought you could rest, but you found out you were wrong
And there's another need another battle
another one more thing that comes along

and on the inside
you hear the fall but you hate the falling sound
and on the inside
you can't pick another broken piece up off the ground
well I know

Hush little baby don't say a word
Daddy's gone and bought you a great big heaven to rest in
He's bought it with blood and put the seal in your heart
it'll give you the hope you need to get up and start again

when all the things you thought you left behind are still hanging on
and everything you try to do right ends up all wrong

and on the inside everyone else seems basically fine
but on the inside even they won't let go of the dead and cling to what's alive
well I AM

~Hush by Waterdeep

2002-11-16T14:51:00.000-06:00

today's heart beat:
May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be pleasing in your sight, O Lord, my Rock and my Redeemer. (Psalm 19:14)

2002-11-13T22:38:00.000-06:00

So today I decided to start blogging. It is kind of strange due to the fact I was tremendously opposed to the idea of a blog about a week ago. I am quite new to this so bear with me as I figure it all out! I hope you are having a wonderfully fulfilled day in Christ!